Lexicon For Ladykillers

by Ted Mark from Scamp

When she says...                                                   She means... 

Able-bodied...........................................................Marriageable

Bachelor................................................................Abomination

Cad.......................................................................Former lover

Doctor................................................................Mama's choice

Eve....................................................................First conqueror

Free Love..........................................................Expensive affair

Gentleman...............................................................Big spender

Hot Prospect.............................................................Single man

Idiot...........................................Former lover's current girlfriend

Job........................................................Gauge of marriageability

Kiss.......................................................Investment in the future

Love.................................................Justification for the present

Mama......................................................The absolute authority

No.................................................................................Maybe

Older Man.....................................................A possibility if rich

Platonic...............................................................Without hands

Queer..........................................................Confirmed bachelor

Rhinestone.......................................Other girl's engagement ring

Sex.............................................................................Marriage

Tense.......................................................................Oversexed

Unfit.....................................................................Married man

Vice................Sex, smoking, drinking, or anything else you enjoy

Wedding........................................................Ultimate objective

X-Ray Eyes..........................Any eyes that focus below her neck

Yes.............................................................................I give up

Zeal....................................................................Pursuit of man

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