How to Talk Sexy

Sweet Nothings

This exercise begins with your partner lying in bed, face down. You should be sitting, or lying on your side, very close to him.... Think about all of those sexy words and sentences you've been aching to say to this man. If you need to refresh your memory,check your notebook before you start the exercise. Choose [a word] ... then lean over and whisper it in his ear. Proceed in this fashion through at least a dozen words. Now try some sentences.

             There is one very important requirement for this exercise: Your partner must remain silent and passive the entire time. Even if he thinks he is being helpful, unwelcome feedback can disrupt the mood and make you clam up in a hurry. He needs to stay quiet, and stay still, lying face-down on the bed.  


Doctor Doctor

 Your partner's assignment is to study the various parts of your body, describe them in the sexiest language he can muster, and talk freely about how each part turns him on....
     He might want to say, for example, "Your neck is so smooth and so soft I want to kiss and bite it...." Now let your partner remove your blouse so that he can study, fully appreciate, and talk to you about your shoulders, your back, your arms, and your hands.... Proceeding slowly and intently, he should study your buttocks, hips, thighs, and calves, talking oh-so-sexy as he goes. Next come your ankles, then the soles of your feet, and finally your toes.

             After fifteen minutes, turn over and lie comfortably on your back. Starting with your face - your eyes, nose, mouth, chin - your partner should spend the next fifteen minutes slowly working his way down your entire body until he has reached your toes. He should always try to make his descriptions as sexy as possible, letting you know how truly exciting each part of your body is. He might want to say things such as: "Your thighs are so soft they make me hard" or "Every time I look at your nipples I want to put them in my mouth."

     Remember: You're not supposed to do anything, just listen, and he's not supposed to do anything but talk. Don't break the rules!


Come and Get It

             This exercise begins the moment you and your partner enter the bedroom (or whatever room you choose for the exercise). For the first twenty to thirty minutes, you will play the active role and your partner will play the passive role.

             As the active partner, you will start by making your first request. You can ask for anything you can think of, but you need to be very specific. For example, you might start by saying: "Please light some candles" or "Please take off everything but your underwear" or "Please take off my shoes and massage my feet." Nothing can happen
     until you ask for it. Your partner can refuse your request, but all of the choices are yours.... It helps a great deal to stop and think for a moment before you make any request; think about what it is you want at this very moment... Think about your needs - he'll get his chance soon enough....

             If your partner accepts your request, but he is not doing exactly what you want, give him gentle, but straightforward directions until he gets it right. If it's something about the way he's touching you or not touching you, for example, guide his hands or demonstrate with your own hands.

     After twenty or thirty minutes, switch roles...


An added fun twist:

        "The passive partner also has the right to respond verbally with provocative statements such as 'Ask me again,' 'I didn't hear you,' 'Say it louder,' 'Say please,' or 'Beg me.' This erotic taunting must always be done in a way that is playful and loving; it must never be done in a way that is demeaning or full of ridicule. In addition, the passive partner can only play with the active partner's request if he or she has every intention of ultimately responding to that request."  Switch roles halfway through.


Simply a hot way to have sex

             This time, once you have made a request of your partner and he starts to comply, it is your job to fill his ears with as much sexy feedback as possible. You want to do this in a stream of consciousness fashion, trying very hard not to censor yourself. Your goal is to give him a blow-by-blow description in the sexiest way possible, of how everything he is doing is making you feel. You can do this with dialogue, sounds, or a combination of the two. Just let it out. And don't stop! After twenty to thirty minutes, switch roles and give your partner a chance to talk really sexy to you.

     For a variation on this, try incorporating the playful taunting technique.  If you are playing the active role, let your partner know how this is making  you feel (For example: "You're making me crazy ... I have to have you inside of me now!"); then let him know what it feels like when you finally get what you're begging for.


It's For You

     Pick up the telephone and call your partner. When you are certain it is him on the line, tell him something really sexy, and then hang up. You might say, for example: "I just wanted you to know I'm not wearing any underwear" or "If I were there right now I'd let you make love to me on top of your desk...."


Beep, Beep

     Does your partner have an answering machine or voice mail service that only he has access to? If he does, leave him a really sexy message when he'd least expect it. Here's an example of a message that will change a man's mood for a while: "I just called to tell you that I'm thinking about your beautiful stiff penis...."


Phone Home

     Call your partner and, in your sexiest voice, tell him how much you miss him. Tell him how much you want him to have an orgasm before he goes to sleep, and that you'll "talk him through it" if he'll do the necessary work on his end....

     Now tell him in the greatest of detail what you would be doing with him if he were in bed with you right now. Tell him what you're wearing (or not wearing). Tell him how you're touching yourself, and how that feels. Describe your body to him in detail. Talk to him about his body. Tell him how much it turns you on, and how you wish you were touching him....

     You may want to take turns verbally stimulating each other, or you may opt for simultaneous stimulation. Either way makes for very pleasant dreams.

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