What does an Orgasm feel like?

My quick answer to the question, “what does an orgasm feel like?” is that it feels great. Thank you very much. No please, let’s save all the applause for the end. In this exploration of orgasms I will attempt to elaborate a little further than an average quickie. I will also aim to respond in a manner different than those which I have read before. Upon beginning this endeavour, I searched for a few hours on the internet and found a surprisingly vast amount of information. There were doctors and psychologists, advice columnists and sexual therapists, even regular so-called experienced people and supposedly inexperienced people tackling the topic. I am none of these. In the words of a man known to have a well developed forearm, “I am what I am and that’s all that I am.” So, you may find my approach to be a little unorthodox.

Of course, “orthodoxy”, or the customs, standards, usual practices, and manner of human behaviour, is usually thought of as a religious or schooled way to act. I’d like to suggest some similarities between the two institutions of organized religion and the apparently less organized sexual schools of thought.

Firstly, both religious and sexual behaviour seem to be areas of high scrutiny by others but are not necessarily talked of openly. In other words, although there may be certain rights associated with personal practices of these sort, casting aspersions on someone’s choices is likely to invite criticism upon the person making the comments, but we all seem to know some level of what is proper and what is not and anyone who may dare to hover around the boundary is likely to hear whispers, rumours, jokes, or even insults as a result.

Secondly, to some degree at least, everyone given the opportunity to experience life as an adult human being will grapple with questions about how they feel, think, and believe and will compare and contrast themselves with others. Society of all kinds are known to create a group consensus and enact rules and laws to protect that status quo. Those who choose to deviate from the norm can find their freedom infringed upon and efforts made to convert them.

Thirdly, a certain formality can often be noticed in those who dare to express their views on both subjects. Not unlike that which I choose to use here and for now. Often this formality can be construed as authoritarian, clinical, informative, intellectual, or perhaps lofty and stand-offish. Maybe one small aspect of this behaviour by the writer is to avoid any undo upset of the reader’s sensibilities. My experience is that it may also limit the reader’s ability to sense the subject matter as effectively as they might otherwise.

And lastly, in regard to orthodoxy and how it relates to religion and learned sexuality, I’ll revise my original comment. It often doesn’t feel great. In fact, feelings seem to have been removed from the equation entirely, as are the personal sensations the writer experiences on the subject. For those who have come to know some of me from what I have written, I prefer a hands on approach to the manner of my expression. And I’m not above playing with words a little too.

Now that we have covered the opening formalities, how about if we just talk a bit? Let’s be friends here. Maybe this can be like we’re just having a little chat about some personal stuff. I think we both have some strong feelings about this topic so I’ll open up my heart and soul for you and maybe you can recognize something in me that appeals to you. I’ll risk your judgment if you’ll risk trying to understand me. If something doesn’t work out quite right for either of us we can apologize and forgive, or say it differently and change perspective, and maybe together we can open and close some parts to this question. But I’ll warn you in advance, there are different ways to interpret the meaning of these words I’m choosing. I’ll trust you to give them a little chew before ingesting. I’m not FDA approved.

O.K. then, let’s start over with the question again. What does an orgasm feel like? It feels great. Ya, I know I keep saying that, but it does. It feels really, really, great. When I started having my first orgasms at about the age of fourteen the whole world changed. I remember looking at the people around me and thinking thoughts like, “You know about this stuff don’t you? How come you never said or say anything about it? How do you do it? What do you look like when you’re doing it? And wow, everybody is doing this, I never knew that, and isn’t it weird how hardly anybody ever talks about this stuff?”

Before I had my first orgasm I remember thinking about whether or not I already had one. Sometimes I would even look down at my genitals when I was having a particularly pleasant pee and wonder if I was cumming. It wasn’t until that fateful day in the shower, when I just kept rubbing myself even after I was already clean enough, and I just knew beyond any doubt, I wanted to keep on rubbing, and then, when I was done. I’ve heard some people say “if you don’t know whether you’ve had an orgasm or not, then you haven’t.” I think, if I heard that before I had my first orgasm, it might not have meant much to me. Maybe it’s like saying, “If you don’t know whether you’re drunk or not, then you are.” Or perhaps, “If you’re asking whether you’re crazy or not, then you aren’t.” No matter how you answer those questions, the person asking them isn’t really any more informed.

So, maybe you’ll know when it happens. But who wants to wait for that stuff huh? Aint that like hearing, “You shoulda thought about that before you did it.” I’m gonna guess that’s not the kind of finger wagging you wanna see. Wouldn’t it be better to be able to see how other people do it? Wouldn’t it be better to watch what happens to someone else when they have an orgasm so you could tell whether or not you’re kinda similar? And wouldn’t it be better if this wasn’t virtually impossible?

Have you ever tried reading porn? Good luck getting more than a sentence or two about the actual orgasm. Oh sure, some might have a whole paragraph of “Ooohs, ohhh’s, or ahhh’s.” Some might even describe the orgasm by using verbs like “thrashed, bucked, flailed, popped, or creamed.” But that could also be describing various actions involving corn.

Have you ever tried watching porn? Good luck finding a female orgasm. Good luck finding a faked female orgasm. Good luck finding a woman who might be wondering whether she was even close to having an orgasm or not. But you are almost always assured of seeing a male orgasm. I’ve often found it curious that male orgasms in porn are virtually guaranteed and female orgasms are virtually non-existent considering most porn is watched by men. Maybe it’s just me but the sight of a woman having an orgasm seems the most precious and rare commodity in our society’s media and the thing used more than anything else in our society’s media is the female body. Am I crazy?

Have you ever tried talking to women about their orgasms? Good luck having to sleep alone or on the couch guys, even women don’t get much of a response asking those questions. I asked the question once upon a time on the message board and out of 671 times the question was read there was one response. And that response wasn’t as long as this paragraph.

So, I’m going to have a crack.

A couple of days ago, while having a conversation with a woman who hadn’t had an orgasm yet, an example popped up. Yah, like popcorn. Wouldn’t that be a nice way to have multiple orgasms? Maybe finding something similar to an orgasm might be helpful in describing what an orgasm feels like. Maybe comparing the feeling of something we know might help to know something we don’t. Maybe like a metaphor. Maybe like a simile even. Maybe I’ll just do that.....

Maybe an orgasm is like running a race. But backwards. You could actually start by crossing your end line, stretched out and reaching, in a sort of photo finish. Then moving frame by frame in slow motion gradually increasing in acceleration toward your initial opening thrust. Consider how your legs are moving in circular motions and how it affects your bum and pelvis and torso. There’s a back and forth feeling as one side comes up and the other goes down. Muscles squeeze together and relax slowly faster and faster. Breathing changes from a regular gulping to a gasping grunting. And as you close in to that place where the life of our race begins you might curl up into a crouching fetal start position. Then, finally, there’s a startling BANG as a trigger is pulled and a gun goes off.


How many times have we heard analogies about what love is.....like, love is blind, or love is not having to say your sorry, or love is the beginning of evolution backwards (ok, so maybe I throw my own junk in at times). I’m even old enough to remember a comic that had a different response every day of the week. Well, at least every Sunday in the funnies anyway. Maybe we can find a way to spread our own fun knees open at least once a week (and I like every day myself) and think of a new way to express having an orgasm. My impression is that others really would like to watch and learn.

I’m going to ask our beloved mistress Jenne to attach a feedback section to this article so that anybody who wants to add a metaphorical description to what an orgasm feels like, has a place to do so. Maybe if you’ve heard a clever description, or had something pop up all on your own, you might like to share it with all of us. I’m going to make an effort to throw a few choice kernels in every now and then myself. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to settle down in a nice comfy chair and enjoy a big bowl someday? I know I’d be adding my own extra butter.

And I know in my heart, think in my mind, and believe in my soul that the female orgasm is the most fortunate and blessed gift of the human experience. Anything I can do for others to experience them in as many different ways as they can is one of my life’s most treasured ambitions. Of course this isn’t a completely altruistic pursuit. It could be viewed as completely selfish. But then again, so can masturbation. I’d prefer to see this subject opened up though wouldn’t you?

I had a vision once. It was an image of the earth from out in space. Suddenly, an idea came upon us all. It began slowly at first but the tempo quickened faster and faster in it’s intensity. Eventually, everyone in the world had the same idea and it began to take on a life of it’s own. When I watched this global revelation take hold it reminded me of popcorn. One pop, then another, then a few at a time, and before long there were so many of them I lost the ability to distinguish them from one another and a great expansion and explosion was taking place before my eyes. I watched as all the people on the planet were popping to the point that Earth itself exploded into its inevitable and intended conclusion. And when it was all over and done with, I wondered if that was how God got off.