Untitled
Though it doesn't show
It still hurts inside
Still I think of all the times
I sat alone and cried
My childhood was ruined
and I can't go back in time
Momma, what were you thinking
What was going through your mind
Daddy you've done so much wrong
It kills me inside and brings me down
Still, I try to stand tall and strong
But all I can do is frown
Did you think I'd never know
Did you even care
How could you leave for days at a time
Like I wasn't even there
I try to hold my head up
but there's not a day I don't think of the past
I hide the feelings deep down inside me
Did you think I'd forget that fast
It's been years and there are more years to come
and still it'll hurt me as the days pass by
I'll never understand why you did it
I'll never understand why you lied
Yeah...it's better now
and everything is fine
But you will never understand
What I had in my mind
I felt like you didn't want me
Like I was nothing in this world
Mom and Dad, you were addicted to crack
I was an eight year old girl
I lived with family and friends
'cause all the money went for crack
Didn't know where you were going
Didn't know when you would be back
Daddy, I watched you beat my mom
She didn't leave 'cause she was addicted
Every time we'd find a place and settle down
A month later we'd be evicted
I was eight; my sister was nine
My little brother was two
How would it make you feel
If your parents did that to you
You will never understand
How you made us feel inside
So many times I stayed up late
Couldn't sleep, could only cry
I know I wouldn't do that to my kids
So you did teach me something good
But why you would want to do that to us
Is something I never understood
I can never forgive you for that mistake
Because it has changed my whole life
There was always nothing but drama
So there was always strife
I still love you with all my heart
Nothing can make that change
Nothing can make you not my parents
Nothing can make the past rearrange
I'm gald I turned out the way I did
and not like most kids would
I know what not to do
and I know what I should
I love you, Mom
and I love you, Dad
I love you for not giving me
The things I never had