Things Freshmen Can Expect from 1st Year of College


10. Master the art of binge drinking.

9. Learn from students how to get calling cards Mom and Dad gave you to cover 1-900 charges.

8. Grocery shopping on the change found in the sofa cushions.

7. A steady diet of macaroni & cheese, cereal and Fritos.

6. Quarters are the hottest commodity for laundry, vending machines and drinking games.

5. Alcohol consumed is inversely proportional to grade point average.

4. Weekends start on Thursday.

3. Frat parties are exactly like they are in the movies.

2. You'll be able to stay up all night doing nothing and fall asleep in class in two seconds.

1. Hornier girls than in high school.