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Why Dogs are better than Women


- Dogs don't cry.

- Dogs love it when your friends come over.

- Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.

- Dogs think you sing great.

- A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.

- Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.

- The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.

- Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.

- Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

- Dogs are excited by rough play.

- Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.

- Dogs understand that farts are funny.

- Dogs love red meat.

- Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.

- Anyone can get a good-looking dog. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.

- Dogs don't shop.

- Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.

- A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.

- Dogs never need to examine the relationship.

- A dog's parents never visit.

- Dogs love long car trips.

- Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.

- Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.

- Dogs like beer.

- Dogs don't hate their bodies.

- No dog ever bought a Kenny G, Cher or Barbra Streisand album.

- No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.

- Dogs never criticize.

- Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

- Dogs never expect gifts.

- It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.

- Dogs don't worry about germs.

- Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.

- Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk, and the back of your sock drawer.

- Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.

- Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a lobster.

- You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.

- Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.

- Dogs don't borrow your shirts.

- Dogs never want foot-rubs.

- Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.

- Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

- Dogs can't talk.

- Dogs aren't catty.

- Dogs seldom outlive you.

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